14.

The soul is dramatic. I think this is one of the reasons I sometimes get the impression I have been conceived as an overreaction.

What did you have for breakfast?

Universes.

What will you have for lunch?

Nothing.

And for tea?

Tea is for tomorrow & tomorrow is for tea, so Eterni-tea maybe.

If the Meat Factory is perpetual & perpetuated, Eternity is eternal & non-eventual. In Eternity ends end & beginnings do not begin & meaning can get a foothold. The perpetual can never break through to these kinds of circles, except perhaps through never lasting forever — though it has a habit then of playing over again.

Writing may be a way of breaking my resistance to my own death. Perhaps it isn’t really mine but then what is? Nor do I think it can belong to those who may share in it, which is to say it is not ours either, it does not belong to us.

If in Eternity I give rise to who births me non-circularly then I can be born only by death. The soul is dramatic because life is so hard to bear that only death can really bear us. This is why war belongs in heaven & seems always to go wrong on earth. Wrong wrong. This is the kind of necessary that in truth is freedom but which becomes slavery whenever we lie.

The soul is dramatic because it is doing its damnedest to tell the truth in a world that can barely make sense of it, which must after all be the true source of the absurd.